Confessions: Fears

Have you noticed that as you get older you become more fearful of things in your life or just life in general? When I was a kid there weren't very many things that I was afraid of, besides being kidnapped or something of the like. As I get older my list of fears tends to grow and my invincibility cloak seems to be nonexistent. I'm sure it has something to do with realizing that our mortality can be taken in an instant. As a child, if you've never experienced a death then you tend to keep on living in a happy little bubble. But if you are one of the unlucky ones and you experience tragic or sudden losses at a young age, you begin to understand how short and precious life really is. I think part of the way you can overcome your fears is by voicing them and talking out what the fear is all about. It's the first step towards getting rid of or calming that awful anxiety that drives our fear train.
So here are some of mine.
{Flying}I know there are many of you out there who share in my anxiety about flying. While it gives me anxiety, I don't let that fear deter me from taking trips. Most of the time I don't have a choice. I was traveling a lot for work for about a year and I just had to suck it up, and sometimes take a prescribed anti-anxiety, and get on that plane. I think we all know the fear associated with this. I don't want to die. Additionally I don't want fear to be the last emotion I experience on this earth. Most of the time I just have to talk myself through it and just breath. I can hold it together for the most part but if we hit bad turbulence I'm a mess. Sometimes I'll read all kinds of statistics to help me cope with the stress. Like your chances of dying in a plane crash are 1 in 11 million. Chances of dying in a car crash 1 in 5,000. 

via

Seriously how did this even happen.

{Elevators}I got stuck in an elevator for probably 1 minute about 13 years ago and I swear I never recovered fully. There are some elevators, like the one in my office building, that I will absolutely not get on alone. That stupid thing had the doors stuck open for 3 days straight. And one of my coworkers once got stuck in there for 10 minutes. No thank you. That being said, I've gotten much better about this fear. I have an elevator in my apartment building and I ride it everyday. The first day we rode the elevator Scott caught be counting the seconds until the doors opened on the ground floor. It's 8 seconds in case you are wondering. Why do I do this? Well if I feel a little stressed I know that I don't have to really start panicking until I get to 9 or 10 seconds. I should also state that I don't have a fear of glass elevators, because if it gets stuck I can still see out. Unless said glass elevator is on the outside of a building...I don't love that.

{Heights}Probably goes along with the flying and mortality thing. Being up high just doesn't seem all that safe. I prefer my feet on the ground. I did go up the space needle and next time I'm in NY I will go up the Empire State Building since I didn't do it last time I was there. I let fear get the best of me on that one. 

{Pregnancy}This one is a little harder to admit but that's ok. I'm a little afraid that I might not be able to get pregnant. Not that I have ever tried or am even ready for that, but it's always a little fear in the back of my mind. What if, when I'm ready, I can't get pregnant. I had my annual woman appointment last week and you know how we all say 30 is the new 20. My gynecologist begs to differ. Apparently, to her, 30 is the new 40 because she told me that my grape eggs are pretty much turning into raisins as we speak and I need to consider thinking about having kids if I do in fact want them. Yes, I was verbally assaulted by my doctor. Just when I was starting to really feel like 30 was the new 20 and BAM! she hits me with that nugget. Time will tell on this one.What are your fears?
Liking up with Kathy for this weeks confessions.